A glorious sunny day. Bright blue cloudless sky. Chilly wind, a beautiful spring morning. Invigorating and joyful so why do I feel tired and unmoving. I have realised that Grief is not just about tears it the total disintegration of one's self. In the moment after your loved one dies your life is irrevocably changed forever. Grief has many forms beside the tears. It's a burden that may lessen with time but never completely dissapears. You are, stuck like a boulder, in a stream whilst life flows uncaring around you. Parting to accommodate you but never really touching you. The burden of grief is relentless Sitting here watching the sky I know I have things that need to be done but it's far less of an effort to just sit. I feel removed from life, watching it through the wrong end of a telescope, part of but a long way away. The many faces of grief remain hidden waiting to catch me when least expected. Altered in so many ways I will live a life always in the shadow of grief. As said: To live and not loved is to not lived at all. I have lived loved and been deeply loved and will live again different and hopefully stronger x

Posted by dianna_ellson at 2022-04-24 08:05:14 UTC