Today marks 6 months since I lost my fiancé suddenly at the age of 38… It’s hard to believe half a year has gone by since I’ve seen you, held you, heard your voice. If I’d known the last time I talked to you was going to be on FaceTime about how to turn the hot water on at the lake house, I would’ve told you I love you about 1000 times before hanging up that call. I’m sad, angry, confused - all things I hate feeling. I was left asking the biggest “why?” to a question that will never be answered. It’s such a shame to me that you’re missing out on all this good stuff that’s been going on; just like the world and my life are missing out from all the good you brought to it. I thought this would get easier as time went on, but the shitty thing about grief is it never gets easier. I never know when it’s going to hit or how bad it’s going to be. Days like today only solidify the fact that you’re really gone, and that this isn’t some horrible nightmare that I can wake up from, even though I’d give anything if I could. I miss you, that goes without saying, but I also miss our life together and all the promise that it held. Not to mention the fact that it’s bullshit that you got cheated out of all of it, just as much as the rest of us. I love you so much and I can’t wait until I see your face again - I hope wherever you are, you’re at peace and that there’s an icy cold grapefruit White Claw and a pack of Parliaments always on hand for ya. Miss your face, always ♥️

Posted by annae83 at 2022-07-28 12:39:22 UTC