almost 4 months ago I lost my partner. he struggled with addiction and spiraled into bipolar psychosis before taking his own life. he did not believe he had any mental illness and refused hundreds of attempts for help. i fled our apartment about 2 months before his death out of fear for my own life. complex grief is so difficult and feels very lonely most of the time. i remember the version of him that was so kind, gentle, caring, and always made me feel safe. and i also remember the monster who he became with the onset of his bipolar. therapy has been helping me immensely but it’s still so difficult to carry this grief that no one understands fully.

Posted by kenzief at 2024-09-05 20:46:07 UTC