It’s going on three weeks since I lost my ex partner. I’ve always been deeply madly in love with him, I loved him and adored him dearly, he taught me a lot in life and our bond has been the strongest as we still talked a lot, and sometimes we had dates in the recent months, everyone knew he loved me, due to his addictions and myself choosing sobriety, I’ve been sober since the day we broke up. I’ve had strict boundaries with myself, and haven’t totally moved on at all, it’s truly heartbreaking to lose someone this close to my heart in this way. I am shattered. When I heard the news, I was at work and was put into shock, even before I heard the news I decided to take an extra long walk at lunch break, I felt so much anxiety even before I heard the news. When my mom phoned me, I was in shock. I’ve never felt that much pain in my life. I went immediately to see his family and I stayed with them from when I heard, throughout funeral planning, helping with preparations, choosing what he will wear, and picking out his casket. It was a beautiful service, where I feel we fulfilled his wishes. I felt honoured to be welcomed with the family, I haven’t seen them in months. I always felt bad for the breakup, I knew he was sad. It all makes me so very sad. I don’t want to believe it but it’s true. I can’t stop looking at photos now that I’m back home. I came home yesterday. last time I saw him was May 16 2024, he tried to phone me on the 19. He passed away on the 29th of May.

Posted by Jjmierau at 2024-06-16 10:58:47 UTC