on the 28th of December, my ex-boyfriend died. He was many of my firsts, the first person I truly loved and planned a future with, it didn’t work out with us but only 3 days before he died he said that he’s determined his kids will have my eyes. We planned a life together, but I never met his parents so it is unlikely I will able attend his funeral…I fear I will not get any closure or a way to truly say goodbye. We were trying build bridges, I never replied to his message because I was trying to decided whether getting back together was a good idea. I am now inundated with guilt for not replying, regret for not getting back together, grief of the person I was deeply in love with and was in love with me. Started back at work on Tuesday (I’m a secondary school teacher) and I do not know how to cope - as soon as I’m by myself, I simply just cry. I feel so alone. Apologies, I don’t know why I’m putting this here but I felt the need to “say” how I’m feeling.

Posted by fayeholland97 at 2024-01-03 18:47:17 UTC